October 19, 2009

Relationships, Family and The Holidays

This is how I'm spending Thanksgiving and Christmas. Sweet.

I like my sisters' boyfriends and I like my dad's girlfriend. Who knows when I'll get to say that again so I'm excited to say it now. The last quarter of the year is historically difficult for my family, but everyone seems content now and I hope it lasts through Christmas. I always felt weird when boyfriends and girlfriends came for holidays because for the longest time I was the only one who had a SO and he was rarely invited to those things; I was OK with my boyfriends not coming to holidays because no one else's did, but when other SOs started coming and mine didn't it got awkward.

This year is epically different. For the first time since I was 16 I don't have a boyfriend to (not) invite to Thanksgiving or Christmas. I'm sure to be on the work schedule for Thanksgiving and most likely Christmas too, so I may excuse myself as well. Apparently my mom is spending Christmas with her dog in Palm Springs (she usually announces her absence from Christmas around this time but come December 24th her plans fall through and she wants to do brunch), so Thanksgiving with our mom will be easier on my sisters if I'm not there and they can have Christmas with our dad and their SOs without a 7th wheel. Meanwhile, I'll spend Thanksgiving with some great friends and might spend Christmas with some neighbors (ooh, maybe I'll finally get my ear pierced again!).

I'll admit I am a little sad at the relief I hear in the voices of those I care about when they counsel me on The Break-Up. My mom has yet to approve of a boyfriend of mine and that caused many problems in my family... Knowing that The Ex cared so much for me that he forever alienated my mom by standing up to her still hurts, but that strength and love will be something I look for in my next relationship. I already know I won't worry about whether or not my mom approves of who I love, but I hope her influence over the rest of my family is gone. I'm also a little sad that just after I gave up the person I thought would be the love of my life my dad and my sisters come into relationships that make everyone the happiest I've seen in a good long time. Part of me wishes I could have shared in their happiness for just a little bit. But I know each has exactly what he or she needs right now: they have someone to better them and I have solitude.

I'm looking forward to an autumn with my friends, a winter at the Park, and maybe a new man for the new year...

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